The old man's abacus： ＂I have three daughters, and my grandson can marry a daughter-in-law if the family pays 100 thousand.＂

　　Everyone has heard that it makes no sense for a scholar to meet a soldier. In fact, when we communicate with others, the people who are most difficult to make sense may not be those with low educational level or low quality, but our parents.

　　When you communicate with outsiders, if you encounter such a situation, you will ignore him and stay away from him. Communicate with your lover, the three views disagree, and it's a big deal to break up, and the road goes to the sky, but you can't make any sense at all when communicating with your parents.

　　You should be fair to your parents, and your parents can block you back by saying, "Your wings are hard, you want to go to heaven, right?" You want dignity and personality from your parents, and your parents' saying "You were born with me, so you have to listen to me" will make you don't know what to say. You don't want to sacrifice your own interests to meet your parents' needs. A word of "unfilial" from your parents can make you fall into a storm of public opinion and lift your head to be a man.

　　Facing your parents, it's hard to be positive, difficult to hide, difficult to quarrel and difficult to make peace. Therefore, it's really hard to meet an unreasonable, unable to communicate and opinionated parent.

　　What should we do when we meet such parents?

　　Aunt Su has such an unreasonable mother that she and her two sisters are caught in a marriage storm. As children, they have different responses to their mothers' unreasonable demands, and also have different influences on themselves.

　　01. In the eyes of the mother who prefers boys to girls, we have always been the cash cow for the boys at home;

　　Aunt Su's mother is 83 years old this year. She has a son and three daughters. The son is the youngest and Aunt Su is the third.

　　At that time, Aunt Su's family was not rich, and the birth of four children made the family's economy worse.

　　"I haven't read a book for a few days, and the words I know are probably not a laundry list! When I was young, I did housework every day. The eldest sister goes to work with her parents, the second sister serves her grandparents, and I take my younger brother while doing housework. "

　　My brother bumped into it, and it was Aunt Su who was beaten. When my parents came back, the meal was not cooked yet, and it was Aunt Su who was scolded. As the only boy in the family, my brother doesn't have to do housework. In Aunt Su's impression, my mother rarely even scolds my brother.

　　The eldest sister married in the village next door, and the second sister, who was the most beautiful, was also married under the introduction of relatives, and married in the city. Aunt Su was taken out to work by relatives, met her husband, and argued with her parents for a long time before she successfully obtained the certificate.

　　"When the three of us got married, our parents gave us the same treatment, not to mention any dowry. The bracelets my mother-in-law gave me and the new clothes my husband cut for me were all left by my mother, leaving them to my sister-in-law. The three son-in-law pooled a sum of money to build a building for his younger brother, so that his younger brother could marry a daughter-in-law. "

　　After getting married, Aunt Su's mother still thinks about her daughter.

　　My younger brother didn't want to farm, but wanted to go to work in the city. The second sister, who had the best marriage, ran around and introduced him to a job. Then, after working for a long time, he ran back to his hometown and humiliated his second brother-in-law. When the younger brother and daughter-in-law gave birth to a baby, the mother tirelessly urged Aunt Su to wrap a red envelope, which was about to catch up with her husband's income for one month.

　　"My mother celebrates her birthday every year, not for anything else, just to collect money from her sons-in-law and leave it to her grandchildren; On holidays, you don't need to come, and if you don't have the money, you will be bombarded by telephone; My mother is sick, and the three families take turns to serve, while my brother-in-law can sit at home and watch TV comfortably without any help. My nephew went to college, and our family included a gift of 10,000 yuan. "

　　02. When a nephew marries a wife, the mother has a good abacus;

　　Half a year ago, my nephew went home with his girlfriend, ready to get married.

　　When chatting, the girl relayed her parents' request to the man's family: "My dad said that the bride price should be 60,000 yuan, and the two families should pay half down payment. I am optimistic about a real estate with Dong Ge, and the down payment is 320,000. "

　　In other words, Aunt Su's brother's family has to prepare 160,000 yuan for buying a house, 60,000 yuan for bride price and the cost of getting married, totaling around 300,000 yuan.

　　"Although my nephew is a college student, his ability is insufficient and his expenses are large. In recent years, my brother-in-law has not subsidized him less. There is no deposit at home, and this 300,000 is undoubtedly an astronomical figure. "

　　However, Aunt Su's mother didn't worry. She made a good abacus and said happily to her relatives, "Isn't it 300,000? It's nothing. I have three daughters, and as long as they each pay 100,000 yuan, my grandson will have money to marry his wife. "

　　It turned out that Aunt Su's mother shifted all the pressure to her daughters in the matter of her grandson marrying his daughter-in-law, hoping to let her son and his family enjoy the success.

　　When her request for a daughter-in-law of 100,000 yuan per family reached the three daughters' homes, it caused a huge storm.

　　03. The elder sister's marriage is in jeopardy, and the second sister has divorced;

　　Let's talk about Aunt Su's eldest sister first. She is a standard helper, and she is obedient to her mother.

　　"After receiving the phone call, my elder sister agreed without saying anything, and then went to ask Dajiefu for money. My eldest brother-in-law doesn't agree to pay 100 thousand yuan, but is only willing to pack 10 thousand yuan as a gift. My elder sister is crying and making noise, and my eldest brother-in-law won't let go. In desperation, my elder sister started her son's idea. "

　　Aunt Su's eldest sister ran to her son's house to collect money for the bride price, demanding the dowry of her daughter-in-law, which not only annoyed her daughter-in-law, but also completely disappointed her husband, leaving behind a divorce agreement. Now, Sister Su's marriage is in jeopardy. However, despite this step, Aunt Su's mother's phone call for money has never stopped.

　　As for Aunt Su's second sister, she is a single person now. Seven years ago, when my nephew was admitted to college, Aunt Su's mother asked her second son-in-law to buy a computer and a mobile phone for her grandson, which made her very angry and made her go home and have a quarrel with her wife. Facing the stubborn wife, the second brother-in-law chose to divorce. Because the money at home was earned by the second brother-in-law, and the son and daughter also disliked the mother's practice, so the second sister Su was left home clean.

　　"Now, my second sister works in a factory, working 12 hours a day, and earning only 4,000 yuan a month. Let her take 100,000 yuan. Isn't this driving ducks on the shelves? "

　　04. My practice has made me an unfilial girl in my mother's eyes;

　　So as the youngest daughter, how did Aunt Su respond?

　　"I just told my mother that my nephew was not born to me, so there is no way for me to pay for his wife."

　　Aunt Su knows that her mother is stubborn and ineffective. Aunt Su quarreled with her for money more than once, hoping that she would feel sorry for herself. She was blocked by her mother's crying and crying. When she was reasonable, she was unfilial, and she was too lazy to work hard.

　　Aunt Sue has a son and a daughter under her knee. The son is married and the daughter is about to get married. Aunt Su saved a small amount of money, so she spent part of it for her son, preparing to add 50,000 yuan to her daughter's dowry, and the remaining 100,000 yuan was reserved for the elderly. If you have a bad relationship with your daughter-in-law and have a retreat, how can you take it out and take advantage of your nephew?

　　"I gave him 100,000, and he gave me a pension? I have a son and a daughter. Why should I please him? "

　　After Su Ayi decisively refused her mother, she immediately bought a train ticket and took her husband to the place where her daughter went to work. The phone call from her family was not answered. Anyway, there were other numbers to use. Mom and her brother went to her house, and they closed their eyes. As for the city where Aunt Su's son and daughter live, they don't know.

　　"I am in my hometown, and a friend who has a good relationship told me that my mother denounced me in the family group, called me unfilial, and threatened not to have my daughter. After she died, she didn't want me to come back to die. It's just that I have spent a lot of money on her over the years, and I have served her when she is ill. I am worthy of her. As for the next, sorry, I am old, it is time to consider myself. "

　　When you meet unreasonable parents, being tough may be the only way out.

　　Can Aunt Su be said to be unfilial for avoiding her mother? In my opinion, she didn't do anything wrong. When you meet unreasonable parents, being tough may be the only way out.

　　There is such a classic line in the movie The Godfather:

　　"Softness without boundaries will only make the other side push your luck; Kindness without principle will only let the other party do whatever they want. "

　　The same is true for parents, and we must know how to be fickle.

　　Parents are kind and devoted to the good of their children. Children should be grateful and have a filial piety. Don't let their parents No Country for Old Men leave regrets.

　　Parents are extreme in some things, but the starting point is for your own good, but there is something wrong with their views. You can talk to your parents in good order, analyze the pros and cons, and let your parents know their mistakes and change them.

　　Parents are selfish and don't regard you as their own. They only think about the interests of individuals and other children. A bowl of water is uneven and they don't realize their mistakes. You have no choice but to be tough.

　　Filial piety and foolish filial piety are two different concepts. Respect for parents refers to personality, filial piety, in the heart, in action, not doing things that go against your conscience, and not letting your parents' hard work be paid in vain. Let parents have a sense of security, have enough living expenses and a place to live in their later years, and often visit her to prevent her from being too lonely and meet her reasonable needs, which is already considered filial piety. As for other brothers and sisters, it is a duty to help, not to help.

　　Today's topic: Who do you think is the most correct way for the three Su sisters? Welcome to share your opinions in the comments section.