＂The daughter-in-law is too defeated, and the monthly living expenses are 5000 yuan.＂ The old man complained to his son, but he was sent back to his hometown.

　　It is a common problem for most parents to like to tell their children about their lives and not respect their individuality and choices.

　　In their eyes, no matter how old their children are, whether they are parents or not, they are all children, and what they do is unreliable. Therefore, they always interfere in their children's lives as experienced people, and they always use words like "I am doing it for your own good", "I have eaten more salt than you have eaten rice" and "You were born to me, will I harm you?"

　　For your children, after all, you gave birth to their parents, and they also believe that your intentions are good. Therefore, even if your children feel suffocated and dissatisfied with your interference, they may not turn against you for the sake of filial piety.

　　However, the spouse of your children may not tolerate your interference. After all, you are good for your children, but not necessarily for them. Many times, for the benefit of their children, parents will infringe on the interests of their children's spouses without scruple and regard them as stepping stones rather than relatives.

　　For example, in Double-Sided Adhesive, the reason why the mother-in-law forcibly transformed Hu Lijuan regardless of her daughter-in-law Hu Lijuan's feelings was for her son Li Yaping, hoping that Hu Lijuan would become her son's free nanny, taking care of all the dirty and tiring work, and let her son enjoy it, which is why Li Yaping accepted it with a clear conscience and Hu Lijuan resisted desperately.

　　If the in-laws still only care about their own ideas and let the daughter-in-law be wronged under the banner of being good for her son, the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will naturally be inevitable and even impact her son's marriage.

　　Like Li Yaping's mother, Aunt Feng is also a mother-in-law who only considers her son and doesn't treat her daughter-in-law as family, which leads to the contradiction between her mother-in-law and her daughter-in-law. But the difference is that her son is not a man who can't carry clearly. Between her mother and her wife, she chose the latter and sent Aunt Feng away.

　　After returning to her hometown, Aunt Feng still didn't realize her problem, and she complained to her former acquaintances: "My daughter-in-law is too defeated, and her monthly living expenses are 5,000 yuan. I complained to my son, but she was sent back to her hometown."

　　01. I promised to take the baby, but in less than half a month, they wouldn't let me take it;

　　Aunt Feng's son is 30 years old. He got married four years ago and settled down in the city. Two years ago, Aunt Feng's daughter-in-law gave birth to a son.

　　After the grandson was born, Aunt Feng received a phone call from her son, asking her to help take care of the baby. For the sake of her grandson, Aunt Feng agreed and moved to her son's house to help look after her grandson.

　　Unexpectedly, she only took her grandson for half a month, and she had a conflict with her daughter-in-law.

　　"She is too particular, and the baby's bottle is not used, but she frequently asks for high-temperature disinfection. It's really nothing to do."

　　"Children's diapers, etc., have to buy good ones, saying that they are worried about causing allergies. When we were young, how could we pay attention to the conditions and not come over? My son doesn't have so many famous names. Why don't he grow up healthy? "

　　"When I am a mother, I still don't know how to save money. When I am confined, I will continue to nourish. After going out to work, I will receive express delivery every day, as well as her clothes and cosmetics. Where do you have so much spare money to spend? Don't raise children for money? "

　　"My son work overtime, don't come back for dinner, just the two of us, just eat leftovers to deal with it? She is very delicate. When she saw me put away the cooked chicken soup, she complained that I didn't treat my daughter-in-law like a human being. "

　　"I quit, you can take care of the baby yourself." Aunt Feng originally said angry words, thinking that this could scare her daughter-in-law and make her listen to her honestly and become a qualified wife and mother according to her own requirements. However, her daughter-in-law actually chose to resign as a full-time mother and "politely" asked herself to go back to her hometown.

　　02. My son works overtime every day. She doesn't know how to feel bad. It's too much to spend 5,000 yuan a month.

　　At first, Aunt Feng didn't go back to her hometown, but rented a house in the neighborhood opposite her son's house and lived with her wife.

　　"My daughter-in-law is so unreliable that she doesn't know how to save money at all. If she is left unattended, my son's hard-earned money can't be kept. How can I go safely?"

　　Because she lives near and has nothing to do, Aunt Feng's biggest hobby is to visit her son's house, and Doby's grandson will supervise her daughter-in-law as a full-time mother. As a result, every time she went, her dissatisfaction with her daughter-in-law grew bigger and bigger.

　　"There is such a mother? My grandson is only two years old, so she lets him eat with a spoon instead of feeding the children? When my son was four or five years old, I had to catch up and feed him! She was too busy eating it herself. "

　　When I caught up with the meal and saw the food on my daughter-in-law's table, Aunt Feng trembled with distress: "Just one person, she has to cook chicken soup and eat shrimp. How much does it cost?"

　　Not to mention that she saw her daughter-in-law buying clothes and cosmetics: "A housewife needs to go out when she buys food, and she doesn't attend parties. She dresses so well. Who can she show it to?"

　　Aunt Feng learned from her son that the living expenses of her son and daughter-in-law are 5,000 yuan a month, which is equal to one-third of her son's income, which makes Aunt Feng completely unable to sit still.

　　"My son works overtime every day. She doesn't know how to feel bad. It's too much to spend 5,000 a month."

　　03. It is obvious that my daughter-in-law is too defeated. Why did my son drive me back to my hometown?

　　Aunt Feng knows that her daughter-in-law is a person who can't make ends meet, and she also quarrels, so she can't help her at all. Therefore, Aunt Feng went out to find her son, talked with her son for a long time, criticized her daughter-in-law for nothing, and asked her son to take good care of his wife, and could not let her lose her family like this.

　　"Either I continue to take the baby, she goes out to work, you both give me the salary cards, and I will be responsible for the living expenses, or you will manage the money and let her ask you for money. Every expense must be approved by you."

　　What Aunt Feng can't understand is that it is clear that her request is reasonable and reasonable, and it is for her son's consideration, but her son doesn't appreciate it and gives himself a lecture.

　　"Mom, if you don't help well, forget it, and make trouble for me. Do you want me to get a divorce?"

　　"What's the matter with her eating something good? I'm tired of earning money at work. She has to do housework and take care of the baby. Isn't she tired? You don't know how hard it is to take care of children. "

　　"She is my wife, she spent my money, why? A man makes money but refuses to give flowers to his wife. Will it spread that this man will not be drowned by spitting? Besides, she didn't spend much money on herself at all. I won't eat those good dishes she bought? Does my son not need nutrition? "

　　"Since you don't like her anyway, go back to your hometown. Out of sight, your heart is quiet, so that I won't be bored to death by you."

　　Aunt Feng felt even more depressed when she failed to complain and was sent back to her hometown by her son. After hearing Aunt Feng's complaint, few people sympathized with her, but many people accused Aunt Feng of being nosy and a bad mother-in-law.

　　"The only thing you should be thankful for is that your son is not confused."

　　04. If you can't control your mouth and like to tell your children about their lives, then you can only leave.

　　Zhou Guoping said: "It is instinct to be critical of those close to you, but it is a kind of education to overcome instinct and not be critical of those close to you."

　　Respecting sons and daughters-in-law, not criticizing them, not telling them what to do, and seeking common ground while reserving differences are parents' upbringing. If you want to get the respect of others and the heartfelt filial piety of the younger generation, you must first be a qualified elder and set a good example to get their respect.

　　Put yourself in the other's shoes. If a person always despises you, looks down on you, tramples your dignity under your feet and makes you feel uncomfortable, are you willing to respect him from the heart and get close to him?

　　I hope parents can understand what Zhang Ailing once said: "A middle-aged man often feels lonely, because when he opens his eyes, he is surrounded by people who depend on him, but there is no one he can rely on."

　　When people reach middle age, they should not only honor you, but also support their families, run a marriage, educate their children, develop their careers and deal with their bosses and colleagues. Your son is really under great pressure. When people reach middle age, there are too many things that will make men collapse, and the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is one of them.

　　If you can't control your mouth and like to tell your children about their lives, then you can only leave. Do you want your son to die alone and be laughed at for you? The son also has his own life and needs the understanding and support of his parents. Even if you can't help, you must do it without holding your son back.

　　Today's topic: Do you think Aunt Feng is a bad mother-in-law? Welcome to share your opinions in the comments section.