A man takes his mother-in-law and parents to provide for the elderly, and after one month, he lets them move out： quarreling three times a day is enough.

　　When I watched Ruyi's Royal Love in the Palace, I was deeply impressed by a line by Bai Ruiji in the play, that is, "Everyone's heart is full of flesh, and whoever's daughter hurts".

　　Keerqin wants to marry the first princess, so he has to choose between the daughter of the Queen and the daughter of the Empress Dowager. Both Empress Fucha and Empress Dowager are trying to keep their daughters and want to marry each other's daughters. Because people's hearts are full of flesh, their daughters conceived in October will feel distressed, and others' daughters will naturally have no resonance.

　　In fact, in real life, the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is sharp, and the reason why father-in-law and mother-in-law look at son-in-law is also because of this sentence. They love their children. They not only sacrifice everything for their children's welfare, but also hope that their children will enjoy more happiness and suffer less in marriage. While bossing their daughter-in-law or son-in-law, they feel distressed when they see their children's hard work, such as Li Yaping's double-label mother in Double-sided Tape.

　　Marc levy mentioned in "The Shadow Stealer": "You can't interfere in other people's lives, even for their own good. This is his life."

　　No matter whether you are in-laws, parents-in-law, you always interfere with your children's lives and treat your daughter-in-law or son-in-law with a double standard attitude. Not only can you not get along with them, but you may also bring trouble to your children.

　　Mr. Tao, 55, took care of his mother-in-law and parents for retirement, for the sake of filial piety and a bowl of water. However, one month later, Mr. Tao had to make a decision to let them move away.

　　01. My mother-in-law is single and brought up my daughter. My parents have to be filial when they bring up their sons.

　　Some time ago, Mr. Tao and his wife saved enough money to buy a big house with four rooms and two halls. At that time, my father was surprised and asked him why he bought such a big house when his children were independent.

　　"We have a husband and wife, my mother-in-law, my parents, and a usual storage room. The children are back, the son lives, and the daughter is crowded with her mother-in-law. Anyway, she is close to her grandmother. My mother-in-law and her parents are over 75, so it's time to enjoy family happiness. "

　　Mr. Tao's parents have two daughters and a son. According to the tradition of his hometown, the property belongs to his son, and the pension is also the responsibility of his son. Since Mr. Tao's parents helped to wait on his daughter-in-law for the second confinement and brought her grandson, Mr. Tao's wife also agreed to her in-laws' request for home-based care, but made a request: "No discrimination, and my mother."

　　Mr. Tao's mother-in-law is 77 years old and gave birth to a son and a daughter. More than 40 years ago, the husband and wife were not in harmony, and the man took away his son. Mr. Tao's mother-in-law lived with her daughter and raised her as an adult.

　　"When my wife gave birth to her first child, my grandmother was still alive, paralyzed in bed, unable to take care of herself, and inseparable from my mother, so my mother could not help with her daughter. My mother-in-law took care of my wife for a month and brought my daughter. It really should be treated equally and taken over. The three old people live together and take care of each other. "

　　So, after buying a house, Mr. Tao went to pick up his mother-in-law, his wife went to pick up his in-laws, and five people lived in this big house.

　　02. Before they came, my wife and I had a harmonious relationship. After they came, they quarreled and we quarreled.

　　"In my eyes, my parents and mother-in-law are reasonable, amiable and kind-hearted old people with good temper, so it should not be difficult to get along. What I didn't expect was that I made a big mistake. I shouldn't have arranged this. Let them live together. Those who look up and don't look down want to protect their children, for fear that we have suffered a little injustice. "

　　Before the parents of both sides came to the door, Mr. Tao and his wife had been caring for each other for 27 years, and they had a son and a daughter. Their feelings were relatively harmonious. Although the couple also quarreled, they soon made up.

　　"My wife and I both go to work to make money and do housework. When we have a holiday, we go to the surrounding scenic spots and have a very comfortable life. Now, my wife has retired and got money, and she has done more work, but I will also do manual work. "

　　The problem is that since my mother-in-law and her parents moved in, Mr. Tao has been working or not.

　　"I work, my parents saw it, and then said that my wife, since she doesn't make money, should love men and do housework, and don't let men work so hard. My mother-in-law heard this and quit. She asked my parents, is my daughter a free nanny? Then they quarreled, and I persuaded no one to listen. "

　　Mother-in-law is not good at words, so she went to complain to her daughter when she lost the argument, so Mr. Tao's daughter-in-law took her anger out on Mr. Tao, which triggered the contradiction between husband and wife and aggravated the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

　　"After they came, they quarreled three times a day. I've had enough. My parents wanted to have breakfast, but they didn't do it themselves. My daughter-in-law had to get up and do it, and my mother-in-law didn't do it. There was a quarrel. My daughter-in-law bought something for herself, and my parents thought she was spending money indiscriminately, so my mother-in-law went back and quarreled. My daughter kissed her grandmother, sent her a gift, and forgot her grandparents. My parents were unhappy. Hey, are you finished? "

　　03. I rented a house for them, each living in his own house, so don't bother us;

　　They lived for about a month, and the words of Mr. Tao's daughter-in-law made Mr. Tao decide to rent a house to settle them.

　　"My mother told me that your parents scolded her and told her to drive her away, saying that this was his son's house, and it was outrageous for my mother to stay here alone. My mother is an outsider? Then why didn't they say anything when my mother took her granddaughter? My daughter's surname is my mother's? You must solve this matter and give me an explanation. Otherwise, if my mother leaves, I will leave. "

　　Mr. Tao was very worried and asked his children for help. His daughter told him that since they don't like each other, don't let them live under the same roof.

　　Mr. Tao accepted his daughter's opinion and reached an agreement with his wife. He rented a house for his parents and his mother-in-law nearby, looked for their mothers, persuaded them and let them move in.

　　"Every weekend, we cook, you come home to eat, and we will go to see you when we have time. Other times, let's go our separate ways and don't make it difficult for us, okay? "

　　When Mr. Tao's mother-in-law moved out, it was quite neat, and his parents were a little reluctant, but after listening to his son's analysis of the consequences of not leaving again, he accepted the plan.

　　"Right now, I don't have to listen to their quarrels anymore. My husband and wife have returned to their previous days. They are nearby, and we can arrive at the first time if there is anything. "

　　04. No matter where the elderly are, when they are active, pay attention to the principle that the fragrance is far away and the smell is near.

　　Tu Lei said that the best relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law: between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, between mother-in-law and son-in-law, two words must be done, caring as if they were your own, and treating each other with respect.

　　Love as your own, that is, your son is a son, and his daughter was conceived in October. Why do you say that my son was brought up by me? Although he was brought up by two people, it is also the meat that fell off his body. You have to be as painful as the two, and even more painful than your daughter-in-law. Treat it as a parent in your heart, but do it as a guest.

　　However, people's hearts are indeed fleshy and inevitably biased. It is difficult for parents-in-law, parents-in-law, to make them love their children's spouses as their own flesh and blood. After all, it is natural for parents to love their children, but it is necessary to love their spouses.

　　Since mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can't be as close as mother and daughter, and mother-in-law and son-in-law can't be as close as mother and son-in-law, no matter which side the elderly are, when they are active, they should pay attention to the principle that the fragrance is far away and the smell is near.

　　As Morphy said: "Keeping boundaries and respecting each other is the best way for mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to get along."

　　If you keep a certain distance when you get along with each other, you can avoid a lot of troubles, keep your mouth shut, concentrate on your own life, and don't interfere too much with your children's lives, which is good for you and your children.

　　When people reach their old age, they should let go of their children and grandchildren, who have their own blessings, and you should take care of yourself, let yourself have as much time as possible to take care of yourself and reduce the burden on your children, which is to help your children.

　　Today's topic: Do you agree that adult children continue to live with their parents? Welcome to share your opinions in the comments section.